Daddy's Birthday

Buried at PhotoCasket.com
I love you DAD
I didn't forget your birthday this year!

Motivation - Where do I find some?

It's been a while since I was officially working now... and I'm having a hard time. There's so much to do around this house, but as usual I feel totally overwhelmed when I look around. Each day I think to myself in the morning "I'm going to clean and get the whole downstairs cleaned and done!" Then I come downstairs... see that Alex left her binder and papers all over on the couch, papers all over the dining room table, then there is some napkin and rag on the kitchen sink that looks as though it has been used to clean up blue ink, same thing in the bathroom sink. Abbi's homework was sitting on the kitchen table. This is the day after she brought home an absolutely disgusting mid-term report card. I just hate that my kids can't get it through thier heads, the things that I preach to them every day for the last 12 years. CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELVES!
I keep remembering what Amy said to me when we were re-doing the kitchen "you just gotta get on those kids"... I wish that I could say that yes I need to get on them. But the truth is that I have, I do, every day, every minute, every hour. I mean shit, what does it take? I'm so freakin' frustrated over all of this. I just can't stand it. I spent 2 hours cleaning the kitchen yesterday (yes, it was nasty!) then when the kids got home I asked Abbi to put away the dishes... can you guess how long it took her? 2 hours, OVER 2 hours. To put away a dishwasher full of dishes. Then this morning I go back into the kitchen and see that she hadn't even put away the dishes that were on a towel on the counter, obviously clean dishes too. Not only does she do crappy jobs on every thing I have her do (yes, I've done every chore with her a few times a year so that she knows exactly how to do it right)but she also manages to come up hurt or sick during every chore. She doesn't see it, she just cries and whines when I tell her that I'm sorry if you hurt, but you still have to do your chores... then I get to feel like shit and wonder if it was one of the times that she was telling the thruth. But I just can't let her get away with it either. I'm so sick and tired of the crap that comes with kids... I love the little moments, love the stuff... but not the same crap that keeps going on every day. I'm so so so over it. I wish I was the happy mom that didn't mind the daily shit. I just am not.
Ok, so you can tell how my day will go.
Oh, and we are suddenly a one car family! I'm not sure how I feel about this at all... but oh well.
Everyone have a better day than me, k?

1 Year Today

Since my DAD was found....
I love you Daddy and I will never forget you.

"Gonna Get There Someday"

Well its been a year and there so much to tell
been doing alright in spite of myself
just wish I could stop feeling bad when I pray
But I know I'm gonna get there someday

Got that job I was dreaming about
sometimes its tough traveling around
but who I wanna be still seems so far away
but I know I'm gonna get there someday

glad I told you all I meant to
while I had the chance
cause every moment I had with you
made me who I am

by the way, I met someone new
and wouldn't you know, she's a whole lot like you
still I ain't ready to settle down in one place
but I know I'm gonna get there someday

well I guess I'll be movin on
I'll just leave these daisies by your stone
and momma, I still miss you every day
but I know I'm gonna get there someday

when that'll be, guess only God can say
but I know I'm gonna get there someday

Crazy week!

Well I've been busy with our house... rearranging, baking, cooking and all sorts of stuff. We did our family Thanksgiving last night. It was supposed to be Sunday. Saturday night we spent rearranging the living room to make room for the tree. I hurt myself in the proccess though. I was fixing the new curtains I had put up and then tried to step down from the back of the couch to the coffe table and then to the floor. Well, I had just polished the coffee table and so my foot went flying and the rest of me came down hard and slammed my other leg (shin) into the edge of the table. It hurt, it hurt BAD. I went and got the ice pack right away, then sat down and pulled up my pant leg to see... I freaked! It looked horrendous! It was like a dinosaur egg sticking up off of my shin. Man it was nasty.
So anyway, I couldn't get the dinner done since I could barely walk. So I sat down with ice for most of the day. Then Monday we were going to have our dinner then, but Adrian ended up working late. So we resorted to Tuesday, which Adrian ended up working late again... so that sucked. We didn't end up eating until 8:30 since we were waiting for him. But, at least I have my leftovers. Though I think I OD'd on the triptophan (sp?). I got the kids off to school and Adrian off to work this morning and then fell asleep on the couch until Oriana woke me up at 11!!! Wow!
So today I have to get the family packed up and the house picked up. We are headed out of town for the weekend. The town we are going to should have snow and we are staying in a really nice place with enough room for all of us. Of course I forgot to figure something out for my dog though! I'm trying to find her a kennel to stay in - so last minute I hate this!
Well I really need to get off my butt and get a shower and I'm going to go out looking for some snowsuits for the girls. I hope everyone has a great weekend!

Bitch

When I stand up for
myself and my beliefs,
they call me a
bitch.

When I stand up for
those I love,
they call me a
bitch.

When I speak my mind,
think my own thoughts
or do things my own way,
they call me a
bitch.

Being a bitch
means I won't
compromise what's
in my heart.

It means I live my life
MY way.
It means I won't allow
anyone to step on me.

When I refuse to
tolerate injustice and
speak against it, I am
defined as a
bitch.

The same thing happens
when I take time for
myself instead of being
everyone's maid, or
when I act a little selfish.

It means I have the courage
and strength to allow myself
to be who I truly am
and won't become
anyone else's idea
of what they think I "should" be.

I am outspoken,
opinionated and determined.
I want what I want
and there is nothing
wrong with that!

So try to stomp on me,
try to douse my inner flame,
try to squash every ounce of
beauty I hold within me.
You won't succeed.
And if that makes me a bitch ,
so be it.

I embrace the title and
am proud to bear it.


B - Babe
I - In
T - Total
C - Control of
H - Herself


B = Beautiful
I = Intelligent
T = Talented
C = Charming
H = Hell of a Woman


B = Beautiful
I = Individual
T = That
C = Can
H = Handle anything